As the mammy of two little girls life can be interesting to say the least. It’s full of peaks and troughs. Ups and downs, blessings but also frustrations.
For example, every time we get in the car, even though I tell my kids where we are off to I still find times when I hear the words… “Where are we going?”
“Is this the right way?”
I know, I know it’s kids being kids… I know because I was ‘that kid’, the ‘why kid’! My parents loved it… (Ok maybe not!) They probably endured it like I do. Every time it happens I get frustrated and say “yes of course, mammy knows where we are going”
But the other day driving to pick up my husband I could hear it, you know that moment as God speaks and your heart hears but it begrudgingly hears… Holy chastisement, gentle rebuke… “oh Shelley… How often do you challenge my ways? my roads? my junctions…? How often do you refuse to trust that I know the way to the destination, that I haven’t forgotten it or you?!” *Ouch!
But He’s right… God is always right… But in this moment darn he is right. I do. I can’t help it. Out of my heart comes tumbling the words, God what are you doing? Just like as a child my mouth opened and I said ‘Dad/Mam, you sure this is right?‘
You see I know I’m not alone in this one either. You may not have been that inquisitive and curious kid, but where God is concerned I’m pretty sure once or twice this year you’ve asked God what he’s up to, and that’s OK!
But just remember the words of Isaiah who says ‘my ways are not your ways.’ The message translation of Isaiah 55 says:
“I don’t think the way you think.The way you work isn’t the way I work…. For as the sky soars high above earth, so the way I work surpasses the way you work, and the way I think is beyond the way you think.”
So often I entrust my day to God asking Him to be at the Center but then we get to ‘Independent Street‘ and I suddenly think ‘No, No God, I’ve got this’ I forget the simple prayer I prayed that day to allow Him control, full control.
Then there is days when I am simply at a dead end, my dreams, visions and ideas of what my life is supposed to look like have not come to pass, there is more valleys than mountains and I am silently frustrated that God prefers the long road, the hard road forgetting entirely that it is in these roads that God is refining my character for HIS dreams, visions and ideas of what He wants for me and my family.
Because God sees the big picture, because God sees today and tomorrow and 2018 all in one go and so God knows what is best and yet I so often become a 4/5 year old before him and ask why, when, how?
Question after question? Heart cry after heart cry.. You know what’s so good about God? He never gets frustrated, or annoyed or angry that I keep running back shouting out my questions and asking Him why? He never gets hot and bothered.
In the grace and love that oozes from Him he simply replies ‘trust me, I know the way.’
Occasionally he gets it. I need a moment, I need to stop of on the road of life, for a break, for a coffee or an ice cream, for a Divine appointment to bless another, to focus my attentions back to him. God gets it! He knows the days can be long but he knows the years fly by.
He knows… Just trust him.